In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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