A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize