Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
