I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
