i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize