i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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