Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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