Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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