Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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