I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
