It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
