I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize