I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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