I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
