dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Randomize
