i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
There r osticjed everywhere
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
and you fell through a lawn chair
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