he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
