Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Come back. Shots need mouths.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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