I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
