You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Randomize
