garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Are we in a gay sports bar?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
