I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
