Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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