After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
