I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
