Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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