At least make sure they are 18
Why
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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