He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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