Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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