oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Randomize
