I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize