How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
The Olympian is in my bed
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
