I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
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