weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
This girl is more easily done than said...
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize