You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
