she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Randomize
