Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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