As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Randomize
