Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Sober January is a disaster.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
