No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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