I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
