I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
