Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
