check it out our google latitudes are spooning
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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