Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
