Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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