So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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