Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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