There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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