Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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