I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
